Joke-6 : E-mail Password!

“U love someone
U marry someone else.
The one u marry becomes ur wife or husband.
And the one u loved becomes the password of ur mail id”

Joke-5 : 4 kinds of sex

HOUSE SEX - When you are newly married and have sex all over the house in every room.
BEDROOM SEX - After you have been married for a while, you only have sex in the bedroom.
HALL SEX - After you’ve been married for many, many years you just pass each other in the hall and say “FUCK YOU”
COURTROOM SEX - When your wife and her lawyer fuck you in the divorce court in front of many people for every penny you’ve got.

Joke-4 : Computer Vs Girls

HARD-DISK Girls:
She remembers everything, FOREVER.

RAM Girls:
She forgets about you, the moment you turn her off.

WINDOWS Girls:
Everyone knows that she can’t do a thing right, but no one can live without her.

SCREENSAVER Girls:
She is good for nothing but at least she is fun!

INTERNET Girls:
Difficult to access.

SERVER Girls:
Always busy when you need her.

MULTIMEDIA Girls:
She makes horrible things look beautiful.

CD-ROM Girls:
She is always faster and faster.

E-MAIL Girls:
Every ten things she says, eight are nonsense.

VIRUS Girls:
Also known as “WIFE”; when you are not expecting her, she comes, installs herself and uses all your resources. If you try to uninstall her you will lose something, if you don’t try to uninstall her … you will lose everything…

Joke-3 : JOKE OF THE DAY

Want to propose a girl - Just do it. (Nike)

Before going to propose to a girl - Believe in the best. (BPL)

If you are hesitating before proposing to a girl - Vicks ki goli lo kichkich door karo. (Vicks)

If you are going to propose to a girl, chances are>-50-50. (Britannia)

If a girl slapped you when you proposed to her - Take it easy. (Limca)

Those who succeed in love always say - We dream because we do. (Daewoo)

If some one wants to write a love letter to his girlfriend -likho script apna apna. (Rotomac)

If you love someone - Go get it. (visa power)

Boy riding a bike with neighbor's girl - Neighbors envy owner's pride.(Onida)

Not satisfied with your dates - Yeh dil mangey more.(Pepsi)

A guy having a number of girl friends - Complete Man. (Raymonds)

A smart girl having a number of boyfriends - yeh hai hamara suraksachakra.(Colgate)

For those lost in love - Har shaam ka sathi main aur mera (Bagpiper).

Joke-2 : Good day 2 U

An old lady walked into a Grocery Store. She wanted to buy the best dog food in the world for her little puppy. She went up to the cash register to buy the food. The sales-lady told her that the store did not allow old ladies to buy animal food unless they show the actual animal because a lot of old ladies like to eat the animal food themselves. So the old lady went home, got her dog and went back to the store to buy her dog food. The next day she came back to buy the best cat food around But the Saleslady told her the same thing, so the old lady went back home and brought her cat to the Grocery Store to buy the cat food. The next day the old lady went to the Grocery Store again carrying a big container. She went up to the sales lady and said, "Put your hand inside here". The Saleslady shook her head. "NO", she said, "there is probably something in there that will bite me!" "I promise you that there is nothing in here that will bite you". The old lady said. So the Saleslady stuck her hand inside the container and screamed. To find out what was inside the container you must send this to at least 10 people, when it says, your mail has been sent...instead of clicking OK, hit ALT-8 and the container will pop up on your screen.

Joke-1 : Have you ever noticed how computers in movies differ from real ones?

Here goes:

* Word processors never display a cursor.
* You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences.
* All monitors display 2 inch high letters.
* High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such governmental institution, have easy-to-understand graphical interfaces.
* Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English.
* Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.
* Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS."
* Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer as the characters come across the screen.
* People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the data.
* A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world before
intermission and guess the secret password in two tries.
* If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file, it also
disappears from the screen.
* Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright that it projects
itself onto his/her face.